One of the greatest characteristics of a man of God is to be trustworthy. To be trustworthy is to say that someone is to be found worthy of putting trust or our faith in them. To put it bluntly, if they said it, they will do it. Seems straightforward, and I should be able to wrap this characteristic article up in one simple paragraph, right? Nope, to be found trustworthy is actually much more complex than this. There are so many ways that break others faith or trust in us by what we say or do, or what we do after we say something wrong.
God created us to be social beings, whether that is within our family groups, friend groups, or local church fellowships. We need that interactions in a social setting, but we also need help, we need to depend on one another in everyday affairs and in spiritual affairs. Again, this is where these 3 groups which I listed out above again come into play. They will help us along and we will help them along as well, but the depth and topic of help will depend of the depth of trust we have built up within those groups. Let me illustrate, let’s say you are trying to help a fellow believer with a sin issue, which at this point they are confessing they have a sin and they need prayer, accountability, and encouragement through their fight over this sin. However, you tell a couple of other folks in the church who are not the Pastor or Elder (who may not even need to know every sin issue). This is actually gossip, and now will that fellow believer come back and feel confident in revealing a private matter with you again? Probably not, as they have no trust in your ability to keep such things confidential.
Keep your commitment in word and deed. If you say you are going to do something, do it. If you make plans with someone, be there. Seeing things through is the trademark of a trustworthy person. Let your yes be yes and your no be no, we tend to think little or lightly of this verse and others like these as we are afraid of commitments and vows these days. Generally speaking vows do not even mean all that much, just look at the divorce rate, even among believers. If and when we make a vow, and the wedding vows are some of the biggest ones as we make them between our spouse and God, but really when we make a commitment we need to honor it.
Getting back to the (yes being yes reference) this is actually teaching us that we do not need to invoke swearing (not the foul language) by God or heaven or by our mother’s life, but letting the fact that we saying be even because we our trustworthy. The fact that I have agreed to say that I will do what you have asked of me you have no doubt that I will follow through, you can trust me because I have proven myself through past experiences and behaviors to be worthy of that trust.
Be honest. Even when the outcome will not be in your favor, tell the truth. This shows you have good character, which builds trust. This is not speaking of telling lies, this is speaking out on what this truth is. Take Stephen in Acts chapter 6 and 7, when he was accused of blasphemy. He could have just as easily countered the accusations that were leveled against him, but instead he recounted the history of Israel from the calling of Abraham to the sojourning of Jacob to Egypt, to their enslavement and their eventual deliverance. He then revealed the true nature that the nation of Israel had fallen into, a nation of outward religious works and that is what upset those religious leaders so furiously that they killed him. It did not end well for him, but it did spark a massive growth for the early church and it in the next chapter of Acts we see the calling of another man of great honesty, Saul, who we come to know as the Apostle Paul.
Be transparent. When you make a mistake, admit it. This shows that you are able to take responsibility for your actions without blaming others. This is one of the easiest temptations to fall into, as we try to distance, or at least limit our exposure to ourselves to the outcome of the issue that we may have caused. Take a look at Genesis 3. When after Adam and Eve had sinned and then were aware of what they had done so they hide themselves. As God was walking in the garden He called them and confronted not both of them, but God confronted Adam and what was Adam’s response? “It was the woman who ‘YOU’ gave to me.” Adam realized he messed up, he sinned, but was trying to limit his exposure of guilt, and blame to Eve and to God who created her. Of course, we know how that worked out for him.
Be on time. When you are late, you are showing people that you don’t value them or their time. You are also showing the that you have a hard time keeping your commitments. In our current culture and society people have lost the sense of the importance of being on time. Being on time or punctual is a lost part of discipline. We are unable to manage time effectively anymore, it seems even more so know that so many people have been working remotely. Lost time is wasted time, it is something that can never be recovered. I have seen more young people in the last few years late for their own weddings because being on time was not that important to them, than ever before. Time is a luxury item that no one can afford to buy, let alone waste. Everyone, can earn more money, most people in 2020 and 2021 have received more ‘free’ money than ever before, and with increased minimum wages and labor shortages we can earn more money, but we can never earn more time, earn more days, or years. When we waste them, they are gone forever. So as Ephesians 5:15-16 says “Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil.”
Keep confidences. If someone has told you something, it is because they trust you. Do not share this information with others. Guard the person’s business carefully. This is beyond any type of professional courtesy. When someone shares something with us that should be kept in confidence, or in secret we lose full and complete trustworthiness. As one Christian is to do with another, we are to confess our sins, not to every and all Christians, but to those that we have close fellowship relationships with, those that we have built a deep relationship with. I cannot give a list of things that could be shared and cannot be shared with other, as this things are truly set by the subject and the closeness of the relationship. When we engaging in divulging these intimate trusted secrets we are engaging in gossip and that is clearly defined as a sin.
Don’t gossip. Talking negatively about others behind their backs erodes trust. Remember if people gossip with you, they will gossip about you. We can engage in gossiping without us actually revealing anything anyone has revealed to us in confidence as mentioned in the previous point. Just because we were not trusted with the secret, does not mean we do not lose our trustworthiness by being a gossip. We may be spread a complete falsehood about someone. Or it could be something that is in fact true but has been distorted through all of the hushed retelling, as each person embellishes a little bit with each iteration of the story. Regardless, this is an affront to our God because His Word clearly states that we are not to be a gossip. Gossiping will cause fractures and divides within the body of Christ, and when a Christian is engaged with unbelievers in gossips it is damaging to the testimony of Christ and the transformative power of His gospel.
Apologize. If you have done something wrong, admit it quickly, sincerely and ask what you can do to make it right. When I say quickly, I do not mean hastely, I mean as soon as you realize you made the error. As Jesus says leave your offering on the alter, do not even what to finish the ceremonial offering process when it dawns on you that you made a mistake. Go and make it right with your brother, then come back and finish. This apology must be sincere, God is concerned with the heart, He is not concerned with outward appearances and actions so much as He is with our hearts and our relationships with Him, His Son, and with each other, the apology must be from the heart with the intent and follow through to restore the relationship. The restitution of the relationship is not always complete by saying “I am sorry,” there may be trust issues that have to be worked through, there may be restitution, discipline that must be handled, among other things. But has the one who did the offending or the thing that wrong someone else you must first recognize it and offer up the sincere apology with the intention to retore the relationship.
Be predictable. Don’t let your emotions get the best of you. Be the person who is steady in the room.
This is a hard one to master as we are emotional creatures. God made emotions in us to glorify Him and we must be masters of those emotions in order to do that. This goes far beyond just the outward appearance of being steady or level-headed. Does this mean we cannot have that belly laugh or that sobbing cry, or even get mad, of course not. We certainly can be happy, sad, and get mad, but to have outbursts of anger, uncontrolled anger at the drop of a hat, or crying fits for simple feedback at work on how we might do something better is not being in control of our emotions. We all have been depressed at some point in our lives, even at some point in the last year, look through the gospels and you will see the emotions of Jesus Christ our Lord, and remember He was without sin, because He did not remain there and His emotions where never out of control, even when He made the scourge and ran off the money changers from the temple.
Set the tone. Your attitude will cause a ripple effect with others. Make sure that the ripple effect is positive. This is similar to your emotions but is slightly different. Setting the tone is deciding how you will approach things; how will you handle situations when they come at you. You know you will hit obstacles in life, that is the nature of living on this side of glory. You will face temptations and trials, persecutions and limitations because of one thing or another. How will you handle it? Will you, because you know these things will come, face it with a positive attitude look for a way to navigate through it, over it, around it? Or will you look for a way to side step it, a way to blame someone else, a scape goat, or look at it as a reason to not do anything? Or as an excuse to sin all the more?
Your trustworthiness is set by no one else but you. It is not set by anyone else. There are no other factors that are used in determining it. Sure, the world may say otherwise, but that is the world and the deceiver rules the world using deceptive tactics. We live in the world but we are not of the world. We are not to be conformed to the image of the world but to the image of Christ, so as men of God we are to be more and more like Christ and less and less like the world. The Word of God is full of truth and is full of trustworthy statements, I would rather rely upon it and be transformed to the image of Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us.
Iron Striking Iron 